It’s Not Easy Being Sexy in Sweatpants

There are definite drawbacks to living an energy efficient lifestyle.  Set-back thermostats, and lowered room temperatures have an impact on the libido.  So, in a spirit of humor, here goes….

Peg has always been my sweetheart, and sweats are so nice and cuddly, but they aren’t romantic!  At least not in MY book.  I like to stay warm, I like my bride to stay warm so I really don’t mind either one of us wearing them. They ARE comfy.  There is the danger of becoming one of those seniors / retirees who lives their whole life in them — that’s not for me.  But neither is being cold.

Yesterday we went to Brookfield Mall — haven’t done that in quite a few years actually, it’s a 40+ mile roundtrip for us here in Cudahy. I used to do a lot of shopping for clothes, Peg has never been big on buying clothes so for the early years I actually bought more of her clothes than she did — and I had pretty good taste if I do say so myself.  But that’s another story.  The mall has been remodelled, retrofitted, and changed since our last visit so it was time to at least see what’s new.

I will admit that as life has progressed I find myself less interested in fashion and manufacturing in general. I miss things that are well made at affordable prices.  Too often I have seen and bought shirts or trousers at the mid-level department stores only to get them home and find sloppily sewn seams that ended up tearing out in a couple wearings.  It seems as fussy as you might be about construction there are always a few little quality slips that show up.

But the other side of the lack-of-interest equation is the way in which fashion taste has hit the pits.  As we walked the mall we passed by Victoria’s Secret only to see their new advertising gimick:

Pick-up Panties

I have to say, I never in my life thought that hundreds of thousands of women would think that it was a smart idea to put sexual innuendo on their butt.

I have to say, it boggles my mind.

Don’t get me wrong.  “In my day” there have always been underwear with messages.  You used to buy them in X-rated video shoppes. That’s OK.  Husbands and wives ought to have a little fun about sex.  After all, there’s a reason God made sex so much fun!

But that does not keep me from wondering what makes someone think that it’s really classy to walk around with not so veiled suggestive messages on their butt?  Of course, that’s the rub.  I grew up thinking that going through life with a little bit of class was a good thing.  I know that there were a lot of high schoolers in my own graduation class that got drunk on weekends — but it seems as if getting drunk and doing “wild and crazy” things has become the new norm, and going through life with a sense of there-are-some-things-I’ll-do-and-other-things-I-don’t-do no longer exists as a way of life.  At least in the popular culture.

Which brings me to the second part of my thoughts for the day. We have so bought into advertising that we do absurd things.

This graphic about wearing shorts over sweats just illustrates the point but it’s all about falling into the trap of doing what other people do, just to be like them.

In the 80’s there was a jogging suit craze.  Everyone in the world seemed to be wearing them — but no one was jogging.  I bought a couple pair back then — but I was about 180 lbs and I did actually jog.  I carried my gear along with me each week when I headed out to see customers for the week.  In those days I spent too many nights in too many motels, and my big enjoyment each day was getting up early and jogging before dawn and sometimes getting in a short little jog after work before dinner.  I enjoyed the exhilaration and the endorphin rush, and it was good for me.  That I happened to be wearing something appropriate for the activity made sense.

But what are the fashion crazes today?

Words on your butt.

For that matter — this outfit doesn’t even look like sweats.  I’m not sure what they’re made of, maybe they aren’t  sweats.  But the whole idea of  putting suggestions, or even someone else’s advertising logo on your body eludes me.

It’s funny in the last 50 yrs (since I was old enough to know anything about the world around me) our society has moved from one in which modesty was a virtue to one  in which pre-teens dance like strippers, popular music is filled with misogynistic lyrics instead of bubblegum lyrics.

I suspect there was just as much teenaged necking and snogging going on in my days as there is now; and no one was embarrassed to have bubblegum music on in the background.  We didn’t have to be dressed in skin-tight clothing, actually, as I think about it, there was so much fabric in some of those outfits it was ridiculous.  But there was still the same thrill of teen-aged experimentation as there is today — some things are universal.

Nowadays I dress more for comfort than for seduction.  I guess I still prefer the feeling of something slightly loose over something way too tight.  It would be nice if you could go to the store and buy something as loose as this, but it wouldn’t stay up — even with suspenders.

I’m looking forward to getting the house sold and getting to some place where the temps are warm enough that I don’t want to put on my sweats.  During the spring, fall, and summer I almost live in shorts: legs out, getting a bit of tan, feelin’ the breeze.  The shift to a warmer clime is in big part about getting out of the cold.

Peg and I have been married for 42+ years.  Out of that time I had a 16 car parking lot and 300′ of sidewalk to snowblow.  We moved to West Allis where we had a corner lot and once again a lot of snow blowing to be done.  And then we move here to Cudahy , and when we bought the house we had 128′ of sidewalk and a 13 car parking lot — all to be snow blown.

Needless to say I’m sick and tired of blowing snow.  I’m sick and tired of cold weather. But, soon enough I’ll be out of it.  At least for a while.  I may find that warm weather all the time isn’t as thrilling as I think it might be; I may find that wearing shorts all the time is not as much fun as being all bundled up and cozy.  I may find that sweatpants are sexier than I think at the moment — we’ll find out.

Spring is coming.  The weather is warming.  Soon, I’ll change out of my sweats and into my summer shorts.  But, no matter what happens in the future, I don’t think I’ll be wearing anyone’s messages on my butt.